MINISTER

Parishioners hard pressed for something to say to the clergy after the service have, according to one minister's friend said to him, "You always manage to find something to fill up the time." "I don't care what they say, I like your sermons." "If I'd known you were going to be good today I'd have brought a neighbor." "Did you know there are 243 panes of glass in the windows?" "We shouldn't make you preach so often." 

Arthur Myers in Berkshire Sampler.

A Lutheran newsletter has some tongue-in-cheek suggestions for church members unhappy with their pastor: "Simply send a copy of this letter to six other churches who are tired of their ministers. Then bundle up your pastor and send him to the church at the top of the list. Add your name to the bottom of the list. In one week you will receive 16,436 ministers, and one of them should be a dandy. Have faith in this letter. One man broke the chain and got his old minister back."

Source Unknown.